Myths & Facts About XX-Day

Myths & Facts About XX-Day

From: phloighd@my-deja.com Newsgroups: alt.slack Date: Thu, 08 Jul 1999 03:26:36 GMT

Myth: Since the hierarchy insisted on doing very little, what few events there were appeared slipshod and thrown together at the last minute.

Fact: Praise fuckin' P-Lil. She ran a tight ship, and although she confessed to being pretty damn stressed out, she knew exactly when to quit her job and slack off and let things ride.

Myth: Mark Hosler of Negativland was nowhere to be found.

Fact: At exactly 7:00 AM in every household in Decatur, IL, every O in every box of Cheerio's became a small black X.

Myth: The presence of too many pagans annoyed most Subs to no end.

Fact: Most Subs actually liked the pagans a lot, finding them quite delicious with only just a pat of butter.

Myth: Or Kill Me 90.5 FM has something against New Jersey.

Fact: They are actually huge fans of Bon Jovi and Springsteen, and are well known around the Stone Pony from which they've simulcast many of Bruce's shows.

Myth: The mighty Locnar was in dire physical danger when Stang told him off after being pestered one time too many about The Film Project.

Fact: Locnar's entire presence at XX-Day was a performance piece designed to annoy as many people as possible, specifically regarding The Film Project. He and Stang collaborated on a parable designed to teach the importance of Works over Faith, a message all yeti would be wise to heed. Hail Locnar!

Myth: Operational Indiscretion, the plan to run every Subgenius for political office, has been brutally suppressed by church hierarchy.

Fact: The movement grows by leaps and bounds, with plans forming to run at least nine Subs nationwide for offices ranging from city council to one-world emperor.

Myth: XX-Day sucked.

Fact: Fuck you. Best ever.

Phloighd

All about love, baby.

From: modemac@modemac.com (Modemac)

I'd say that based on the attendance at XX-Day, and the fact that we can hopefully expect to see about the same numbers each year, we've
more-or-less discovered that five days is about the most we can spend taking part in an event like this.

Be that as it may, I'll add my applause to yours -- namely, XX-Day was a BLAST and PRAISE P-LIL!

--
First Online Church of "Bob"
http://www.modemac.com/

From: friday@subgenius.com (Friday Jones) Date: Wed, 07 Jul 1999 18:05:41 -0500

Myth: Papa Joe's "punishment" was all tightly scripted with nothing left to chance.

Fact: Papa Joe's "punishment" was a complete surprise to him and about 96% of the spectators - and YET he still kept on wisecracking!

From: phloighd@my-deja.com

It must be pointed out that I and others did locate an envelope while Jesus was gone (which was most likely the real McCoy, requiring him to fake another) that clearly read "Burn Him."

From: friday@subgenius.com (Friday Jones)

Aha! But notice that the 'H' in Him is capitalized - as in burn Him, Jesus! Jesus was covering His OWN ass by losing the punishment!

He is the Lightning Savior!

From: phloighd@my-deja.com

Cover his own ass? Why would he? The man is the son of JHVH-1 -- and what better way to prove his divinity than self-immolation? Now that's what I want to see on XXX-day, is more burning bodies. Besides, healed scar tissue from flames beats any ol' wuss stigmata any day.

Phloighd
All about love, baby.

From: Locnar@IgLou.com (Governor Rocknar)

Actually, that was a sealed envelope that stated.

"Burn McCoy"

because of DeForrest Kelley dying on the world we left behind, we had to burn the cardboard cutout of McCoy to give him a funeral pyre worthy of Anakin Skywalker in "Return of the Jedi"

Gov. Rocknar

--
Randolph S. Vance
Locnar@Iglou.com (Macintosh Eudora Mail)

QUOTE - "I'll watch some TV, it'll help me to RELAX!" - Ren Hoek

From: Popess Lilith von Fraumench <p-lil@ZubJenius.com>

In article <7m1rc0$gue@news-central.tiac.net>, Modemac <modemac@modemac.com> wrote:

Be that as it may, I'll add my applause to yours -- namely, XX-Day was a BLAST and PRAISE P-LIL!

I had to hunt down Phloighd's post as it never showed up on SexzillaNet, but I agreed with most of it, with a slight qualification. I wasn't that stressed out most of the time--in fact, I rather enjoyed working stage, and plan on doing so again next year. Oh, believe me, I did have my moments when I was less than happy. For instance, making a grand appearance at the Prom only to have the sound guy hunt me down and demand a *schedule* right there on the spot. I wound up missing all of Onan's singing and most of the dancing. No, I wasn't terribly pleased at all. But to be crowned King And Queen Of The Prom the moment I got back with the sound guy's schedule... well, that made up for a lot. I really was touched....

Speaking of praise, we ALL should bow down and glory in the presence of Modemac. While I was taking care of the behind-the-scenes details of running stage, Modemac bravely and successfully braved the audience itself and kept the stage activity flowing! His patter brought many laughs and cheers from the crowd, and his demeanor put every ranter and band at ease. Without him, XX-Day would've been a somewhat lesser thing. You have Modemac to thank. Get to it!

ALL HAIL MODEMAC, the James Brown of the Church! Long May He Pace!!!

The Prophet Lilith

-- ======== Popess Lilith von Fraumench * http://come.to/p.lil ========= == Seattle SubGenii! We are the future! http://ssucc.ragnarokr.com == ==== In ecstasy I mock the world - Emperor, "Ye Entrancemperium" ====

From: Locnar@IgLou.com (Governor Rocknar)

In article <7m3rk6$vj2$1@nnrp1.deja.com>, phloighd@my-deja.com wrote:

Cover his own ass? Why would he? The man is the son of JHVH-1 -- and what better way to prove his divinity than self-immolation? Now that's what I want to see on XXX-day, is more burning bodies. Besides, healed scar tissue from flames beats any ol' wuss stigmata any day.

I burned my Yeti body ENOUGH during THIS XX-Day. My skin's peelin' so bad, I got enough to make me my own lampshade! I won't need to go to a "plastic surgeon" after all the layers peelin from my nose.

NEXT year, I'm setting up MY tent right next to "Or Kill Me" radio's tent, so I can help DJ again. I also plan to AVOID THE SUN LIKE A VAMPIRE, only come out at night, enjoy moonlit swims in the pool, feast on the blood of helpless pinks in the neighboring towns...

Er...um....

Scratch that part about the moonlit swims. You never know when someone like Papa Joe Mama would add a vial of "Conspiracy Holy Water" to the pool/hot tub.

Gov. Rocknar

From: friday@subgenius.com (Friday Jones)

In article <Locnar-0907991530500001@lex-ts3-14.iglou.com>, Locnar@IgLou.com (Governor Rocknar) wrote:

Scratch that part about the moonlit swims. You never know when someone like Papa Joe Mama would add a vial of "Conspiracy Holy Water" to the pool/hot tub.

Awww, leave ol' Papa Joe alone before you hurt his FEELINGS.

-- *** SLAK WARS - EPISODE 1:THE SUBGENIUS MENACE *** The most controversial SubGenius Devival EVER! Visit http://www.fridayjones.com for details

From: phloighd@my-deja.com

Oops, forgot one:

Myth: When the saucers didn't arrive, the assembled Subs began chanting "The Third Time's The Charm." Fact: Some distraught Sub threw a handful of feces which struck me above the waist and splattered, whereupon I began screaming "The turd's on my arm!" and everyone else joined in.

From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@home.com>

Governor Rocknar wrote:
>
>
> And actually, though I didn't intend it, I guess the film project IS a
> lesson about the importance of Works over Faith. To make something that
> will last far beyond when we are gone, that the stories that people will
> tell of our exploits aren't just myths.
>
> To prove to the World that WE DID EXIST.
>

Well Stang's videos and the videos of the other worthy video people aren't exactly chopped liver, you know. Damon W Smith has PLENTY of evidence that we not only exist but we also leer, lie, dance, fight, rant, stay up all night, etc. He was always around, very quiet, kind of like Jane Goodall, and before long it was like on that MTV show Real Life, where everyone stops being polite and starts getting real. I say, the XXDay video will BE a movie, it'll just be the Frenchy, art-fag, documentary kind of movie instead of the glitzy, special-effects, toy-inspired Hollywood kind.

From: pkitty@IntNet.net ()

Geoffrey V. Bronner (geoff.bronner@dartmouth.edu) wrote:
: In article <friday-ya02408000R0707991805410001@news.tiac.net>,
: friday@subgenius.com (Friday Jones) wrote:
: >
: >Myth: Papa Joe's "punishment" was all tightly scripted with nothing left
: >to chance.
: >Fact: Papa Joe's "punishment" was a complete surprise to him and about 96%
: >of the spectators - and YET he still kept on wisecracking!
: >

: Well I guess we would have to give him points for that... a lesser man : would have tried to run away.

Hey, you weren't one of the ones holding the Big Red Straps keeping him there! Our unassuming Papa Joe can put up one HELL of a struggle...

Rev. Pee Kitty
.sigless

From: friday@subgenius.com (Friday Jones)

And many thanks for your help, Pee Kitty! I knew I could count on you when everyone else would think that I was going TOO FAR ... But if you look closely at the still and video, you'll see that those were really big PINK straps. Apropriate - and useful. If Papa Joe had broken free and bolted forward, he would have gone face-first into the bonfire. Now I don't know about you, but I think that Papa Joe is more of a slow-roast, maybe a marinade cut, NOT a quick charbroil or Cajun-style meat.

$lack,
Friday

From: Michael Marcus <marcusm@teleweb.net>

Now I don't know about you, but I think that Papa Joe is more of a slow-roast, maybe a marinade cut, NOT a quick charbroil or Cajun-style meat.

Given his Holocaustal tastes, his skin's for lampshades. You flay that off, and the muscle's right for roasting. Many good uses for the bones and internal organs, too. Think of Papa Joe Mama as the Native Americans used the buffalo. Until he's paid his $30, that's all I'll do.

Bon appetit!

--Jacques Treatment,
free at last!

From: friday@subgenius.com (Friday Jones)

I bet if I stretched his scalp out enough, maybe trimmed the edges with his pubic hair, I could make a DANDY toilet seat cover. That Papa Joe sure does have nice hair. I jest loved running my fingers and my blade through it.

From: Dkr. Armand Geddyn <armandgeddyn@yahoo.com>

Xref: spln alt.slack:166143

Myth: Everyone else drank all the Ministry's and the Bikers's liquor.

Fact: Jesus was on hand to miracle up plenty of booze as the Wedding of Brushwood went on -- we even ended up with a few spare bottles for our trouble!

Myth: Everyone will get to score with the MiniTru girls on XXX-Day.

Fact: Only MiniTru members will score with MiniTru girls.

Dkr. Armand Geddyn
http://www.minitru.org

From: Christopher Lee <clbundy.pp@mail.indy.net>

Eh? Maybe we can get some sort of cooperative joint venture going, seeing as you're now a member of the Church of Homer Simpson, Boddhisattva.

Dr. Christopher Li